In this article we are going to tell you that what you should do when you feel angry? : Anger is a normal and healthy emotion. It is right for a person to get angry at certain situations. This cannot be prevented nor suppressed. It has its benefits as well as detriments. It is one emotion that when not controlled can cause severe damage to the individual and as well as people around. It can lead to negative consequences for your physical and mental health and cause damage to relationships and careers. The actions generated by anger will only result in embarrassing situations. Feeling annoyed and disturbed is natural. It cannot be subdued but can be controlled, so that it leads to no damage.
What Should I Do When I Feel Angry?
There are numerous methods to manage anger so that it can be kept in proper control. Here we list some common practices which can help you manage it.
1. Yoga and Meditation
Anger is an emotion. It is inherent in all human beings. But the extent to which a person can control his emotions varies. Some have the patience to control the vented-up anger. Some others might fail miserably in this attempt. Meditation and yoga are best ways to keep your frequent anger in control. When angry the nervous system gets activated. The rate of heartbeat, blood pressure and breathing becomes higher.
Practicing meditation, and breathing exercises calms down your mind. It clears the brain and relaxes your muscles. There are several anger management techniques such as mindfulness meditation and deep breathing. Daily practice can ease the nerves, keeping you relaxed and calm. Find a peaceful area, breath in slowly and count up to ten and then breath out. This will calm your whole body causing a tremendous impact on your behavior.
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2. Remain calm
Maintaining a calm demeanor is one of the essential remedies for anger. A person may be tempted to act aggressively when provoked. This sudden reaction may hurt others causing a disruption of peace. Staying calm is one way to control yourself. Finding the reason for your anger is important. It can be due to stress or workload. Fuming at others may be a technique of mind to release the emotional stress inside. But when this suppressed feeling is vented out to a person, the clash that occurs may aggravate the current situation. Find out the reason for your anger.
It can be stress, childhood trauma or depression. An awareness about your overwhelming anger will be helpful in purposefully controlling it. Repeat words like “all is well”, “cool off”, “this is okay” and so on to yourself. There are also tips like counting one to ten before responding, smiling, looking at a mirror, splashing cold water on the face, drinking a cup of water and so on.
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3. Avoid the situation
Another method possible is to avoid the situations that cause you irritation. If it is some behavior of your colleague, try to distance yourself from the person. Some situations are sure to make you irritated. When you are aware of them, you can prepare your mind beforehand even if the situation is inevitable. This helps you calm down. Likewise, an in-dept analysis about your short temper will help you find incidents or actions that prompts you to act aggressively. These situations can occur when your ego is hurt or when you feel stressed. Finding the real cause behind your anger is an important step in controlling your emotion because you can prepare your mind for the same.
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This step is not so easy. The reason behind anger can be many. Sometimes it can be an ego problem. You may be afraid of losing respect if behaving the other way. This is just a myth, for, people will always obey you out of fear not due to respect. Everyone loves a humble person. Try to apologize to the person whom you have behaved badly. Saying sorry is never a sign of weakness but can have miraculous effect. An apology can cure any grudge. It not only produces an instant calming effect on you but also makes the other person feel good. This prevents your relationship from falling.
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5. Distract yourself
Distracting yourself is another way. When feeling angry, try to immerse yourself in some activity so that your mind does not get a chance to explode quickly. Engage in some interesting activity. It can be gardening, listening to music or spending time with your pets. These activities ease you, helping prevent a sudden commotion. Gardening is advisable, for nature can always calm your soul. The flowers and trees fill the mind with peace. Listening to music is another suggested method for people who love songs.
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6. Talk to a friend
Talking to someone close can bring huge results. It can be your family or friends. Talk to someone who understands you well. Share with the situation or problem. This can help you a lot. Not only can they calm you but also help you think from the other’s perspective. Stepping into the other person’s shoes is useful in analysing the situation better. They too may have a reason to act in the particular way. Being a third person, your friend can analyse the issue better. Similarly, talking reliefs you a lot. Even if they fail to offer any help, the act of sharing your feelings can keep you at ease. The initial stress and frustration that you felt may vanish. This will provide you with room to think logically. As they are accustomed with your anger, they will be aware on how to react.
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7. Write a diary
Diary writing is another way to sooth your mind. Hot temper can sometimes be due to suppressed emotions and feelings. Childhood trauma and abusive past may be the cause which goes undictated. Most people wish to keep these past incidents to themselves. The curbed feelings are then poured during some other incidents causing embarrassment and shame. Writing a diary can be helpful in this situation for those incidents and feeling can be expressed through writing. The habit of writing diary should be encouraged for this will lift the burden inside the person which may even heal him forever.
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8. Do not act on your emotion
Responding or acting while affected with anger can be dangerous, specially for a short-tempered person. It can cause an immediate dislike for you. This might have a negative effect on your relationships and even in career. Similarly, prudent words never come from a disturbed heart. The actions and words spoken at such moments will be completely motivated by the anger you feel towards the person.
Try to calm yourself first and then decide on the reaction. This will help you take a decision rationally. Maybe the incident was not as serious as you thought, or it can all be a case of misunderstanding or it can even be something that can be solved with a smile. Such a rational thinking helps you a great deal to understand the root cause behind anger and to control it.
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9. Encourage positive thoughts
Positive thoughts are another way to remain calm. Negative thoughts can only trigger more anger. You might not be able to forgive him even if you wish to. Positive thoughts can motivate you to turn your anger into something productive and worthwhile. Make it a habitual practice which will be much easier. When you feel angry towards a person try to think something positive about that individual. Recollect all good moments with him/her. This will calm you down.
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10. Anger Management
It is a psycho-therapeutic method to control anger. This can be made use of at extreme situations where your emotions are completely out of your control. The therapeutic treatment will help you immensely in managing anger. There are signs that indicate that you are frustrated or disturbed. Clenching your fist, headache, losing concentration, feeling irritated are all signs that you are likely to explode. Try to relieve yourself from them. There are anger management classes available. They would provide you techniques to control yourself.
Individual and group sessions will be available. Interacting with people of similar tendency and hearing their life stories will give you a better perspective. Psychological causes like trauma and abuse which result in uncontrollable anger cannot be cured easily. This requires treatment for the root cause is different. Getting angry is only a way of expressing the suppressed feelings. Psycho-therapeutic sessions and treatments would help you find and eradicate this root cause. Prevention and relationship enhancement program, Cognitive behavioral therapy, positive mentalization and personal development, anger journaling and other evidence-based approaches are commonly employed in these treatments.
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Feeling angry is normal, but if not under proper circumstances it can be a danger. It is important to have control over your emotion and to maintain a rational mind. Think clearly and wisely before responding. Mentioned above are some ways to control your anger. Apart from this there are other methods too. All of these may not be practical in everyone’s case. Try to find out which method is best for you and practice it. In this way you can make yourself better.